A case against youth ministry Part 4

A Case against Youth Ministry and Education as it is Commonly Practiced
Part 4: Keeping and Losing the Heart

In 2 Samuel 15, we have recorded for us the sad account of Absalom’s rebellion against his father, King David.

In verse 6, we are told that Absalom “stole the hearts of the men of Israel” away from his father. In this simple statement we learn at least three things. First, a person can “have” the heart of another or even of a multitude. Secondly, a person can lose the heart of another or even of a multitude. And thirdly, someone can steal the heart of a person or even a multitude away from another.

We also learn in this passage that when David had the hearts of the people they loved him and willingly followed him, but when Absalom took their hearts they followed Absalom and rebelled against King David.

And lastly, for our purposes here, we learn from this passage something about how hearts are won, kept and taken: Absalom talked to the people, sympathized with the people and looked out for the people’s interest (v. 3, 4); he touched the people (v. 5) and spent a great deal of time with the people (v. 6, 7). In this way Absalom gained the hearts of the people and the people in turn began to love and follow him.

By contrast, David was obviously distant and out of touch with both Absalom and the people. He had no idea what was going on right under his own nose for so long a time. Simply by doing nothing much at all, David lost the hearts of the people to someone else.

Brethren, isn’t this passage rich with application to us today? Don’t we see so many parents in our own day who are not spending time with their children in any biblical manner and they’re losing them to someone else or something else? Don’t we see so many children who once seemed to love and follow their parents now loving and following someone or something else? Don’t we see children by the multitude who come to rebel against their own parents? Aren’t we witnessing the countless loss, in our own day, of the children of Christian parents?

This is all the more sad when we consider that it would seem that God has wired their little hearts to naturally be given to us, their parents, in the first place. But just like king David we first lose touch with them and then we lose them. Watch the average young child as it is sat down and left in a daycare or nursery of some sort, watch their little heart break as they watch their parents walk away from them and leave them with a group of strangers; all they want is mom and dad.

But watch that same child as time goes by and they have been repeatedly left at daycare, school, nursery, Sunday school and all the rest. Something changes in their hearts as they are constantly pulled (or pushed) away from mother and father and made to spend their time doing other things with other people. And when this constant separation bears the fruit of alienation in their teenage years we act surprised, cry and wonder why this has happened, but isn’t it obvious when we stop and think about it?

If we are going to have children who willingly follow us, we need to weld their hearts to our own while they are yet young. No wonder David’s other son Solomon cried out to his own child in Proverbs 23:26, “My son, give me your heart….”.

Let’s be honest, brethren. It is often very difficult to make time for our children and pull ourselves away from the many other things we need to do; it’s difficult to even want to spend time with them sometimes and a multitude of family divisive programs at church really doesn’t help matters. What are these programs but one more blow among many at the cohesion of the family structure and the parent-child relationship; another wedge between our hearts.

Please consider this as you continue reading; doesn’t the fact the church is losing children to the world on a massive scale simply exhibit that we the parents, like King David, have lost their hearts on a massive scale?